The Room Reads You First: What Executive Presence Really Is and Why It's Quietly Deciding Your Next Promotion

Does your executive presence walk into the room before you do?

There is a reason some people walk into a room and everything shifts. It is not luck. It is not seniority. It is executive presence, and in this episode Phil and Pen are going to show you exactly how to start owning it.

Executive presence is one of the most requested topics in Phil and Pen's coaching work. And the reason is not because people lack skill or knowledge. It is because competence alone will never be enough to get you to the next level. What gets you there is what people believe about you. And that is something you can learn, develop and own.

In this first of two episodes, Phil and Pen get into the deeper internal work that sits underneath every great communicator and leader you have ever admired. From the locus of control and why so many of us are still unconsciously seeking approval from the room, to the Parent Adult Child model and how corporate hierarchy can quietly push you back into a childlike state without you even realising it.

Think about two leaders standing in front of you. Same experience, same knowledge, same role. But one of them makes you want to follow them anywhere. That difference is executive presence. And it shows up in the words you use, the space you take up, and what you silently communicate before you have even opened your mouth.

Research from the Centre for Talent Innovation found that executive presence accounts for roughly 26% of what senior leaders say it takes to get to the next promotion. A quarter of the decision comes down to presence rather than performance.

But zoom into that 26% and it gets even more interesting. Within executive presence itself:

• 67% Gravitas: composure, decisiveness and depth under pressure
• 28% Communication Style: not what you say but how you say it
• 5% Appearance: the layer most people over-invest in and the one that is weighted least

Two thirds of the presence judgement that shapes your career comes down to gravitas alone. Not your slides. Not your outfit. How you show up when it counts.

In this episode you'll discover:

• What executive presence actually is and why competence alone will never be enough to get you to the next level
• The Locus of Control model and how to shift from seeking external validation to leading from a place of internal confidence
• The Parent Adult Child model and how to spot when hierarchy is quietly diminishing your presence
• Practical awareness tools including the Executive Presence Line Up, the diminutive words to drop immediately, and why curiosity might be the single most underrated executive presence skill there is

By the end of this episode, we want you to ask yourself one question. If the people in your last meeting could only see you and not hear you, how would they have ranked your presence in the room? Because the room reads you before you ever say a word.

Stay tuned for part two where Phil and Pen give you the tangible communication tools to dial up your executive presence and make people sit up and take notice.

Transcript

Executive Presence Setup

SPEAKER_01 0:00

So today we're talking about executive presence. It is also a kind of bringing together of a number of our tools. We get asked about this a lot. A lot. And even when people don't necessarily know that's what they need, it is what they need. You can have a presentation skills tool around stagecraft or structuring that's very, very tangible. You can grab it, fill it in, do it. And this executive presence is tough if you don't believe in yourself, if you're not anchored and grounded in your life. Which is why we like it so much, Phil, because we love those. Those inner workings, we love it. Don't wait till you're in the boardroom. Don't wait till you've got the role. Like get your network and your executive presence. Get it going. Make it part of your job. If you're early in career and you walk into a room and people go, ooh, who's this? Great! So in this episode, we're gonna look at what we mean by executive presence, a real kind of practical definition of it using our 4D model, as ever. We're gonna look at the hierarchy trap. What you think is going on versus actually it's an internal thing. And the hierarchy gap is a really important one to break through for executive presence and what we call the locus of controls. Hello, my name's Philip Waller. My name is Penelope Waller, and we are two of the directors at 4D Human Being. And welcome to the 4D Human Being podcast. What's it all about, Pen? It's all about your personal and professional relationships, it's about your communication skills, how you lead, how you work and build teams, how you are looking after yourself and your well-being, and how you are much more at choice. What do we mean by that? Well, sometimes we can get a little caught in patterns in life, and we can all be a little bit on our automatic pilot. So 40 human being is all about helping us get back to choice and being a four-dimensional human being, and your fourth dimension, of course, is intention. So whether it's about your impact, your leadership style, your team dynamics, whether it's about your well-being, whether it's about your communication or your presentation skills. Anything that involves human beings interacting with other human beings, 4D Human Being are here to help. We're gonna take a deep dive and look at some tools, insights, theories that are gonna help you go from a 3D human doing to a 4D human being. So that you can happen to the world rather than the world simply happening to you. Everything is fired up. Houston, we are

The Pony And Trap Pace

SPEAKER_01 2:48

go. Okay, now I'm recording on Garage Band, I'm recording on the phone. It's all systems go. We do this at the beginning of everyone, and and you would think that it would just click in automatically now. Yeah, no, the convenience of tech. It's making me think as we talk about I'm miming it, telephone operators and then the tech. And our experience on a pony and trap. What is called? Is that because of the time era? Like it's going back to the 1950s. The pace. I mean, to think that you could you liked that pace. I liked the pace because it was the shire horses were dictating, and there was no mobile phone, sat nav. Also, motorists coming the other way on a one-lane. Have to back up. I have to back up because less easy for a horse and trap, pony and trap. That was my favourite thing about the whole experience was there was no negotiating who's no negotiating road. No. It's not like no no no, I'm not backing up my four by four. You back up those horses. There was none of that. And also, people were more patient. Overall, they were far more accepting of the pace than if it'd been in a cart, they would probably be in a bit of a It's so interesting. So to put this into context, we went on a Holy Trick ride on Sunday. Don't even ask you. It was it it we thought it was going to be more of a sort of a cart, but it ended up being a surrey with a fringe on top. So we're not going to be able to do it. We thought it was going to be more of a trauma. We didn't break out into song. But what was so interesting was noticing the impact of the environment, the let's call it the tech. I mean, in the case of the horses, it's it's sort of ancient tech. But absolutely. Harnessing a horse to a cart was tech of its dick. It was tech of its cart. And Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan the Horse and Cartman was amazing. But but as as two car as a car, as two cars approach on a single track road, it can get very heated because maybe another car comes behind who's reversing. We've talked about this a lot. You change one of the cars for a pony and truck, nothing else has changed. Still single track, still blocked in the road, still two sets of people. Nothing else has changed apart from the mode of transport.

SPEAKER_02 5:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:10

Completely different experience, like different dynamic. People will engage with you and smile at you and just and and back up. Take photos. How lovely. How lovely that you're taking this day so slowly. Why are we not like that with another motorist, but we are like that with a pony track? It's just interesting, isn't it? I'm gonna do two super segues here. Which is how dynamics shift when we see the other differently, when we don't have an expectation of you can pop that. Why can't you just pop that into reverse? I can, why can't you? Which is a direct analogy to, well, you know, I got that report done in 20 minutes, why can't you?

SPEAKER_00 5:53

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:54

And the other piece, which really super segues to today, which is all about executive presence. Literally can't wait to talk about this, and we talk about it so much in coaching. But Penn, the pace of being in a pony and trap and us just sitting there going, Well, this is where we are, we're just taking this space, yeah, high up, doing things in our own way, not hurrying for other people. There is a wonderful metaphor there for executive presence when everyone else is scooting around on a vesper or a four by four, and you're saying, No, this meeting, pony and trap. Everyone, take a seat. I've got something to say. I'm gonna my phone gets pulling up. I'm gonna I'm gonna triple down on your super segue. Because I don't know what kind of jingle you're gonna do for what kind of jingle that's gonna be. Because I, if I'm really honest, I sort of wasn't looking forward to it. And the main reason for that was being on display, like, because it is very slight. I likened it to the mini railway train we went on when we went on a holiday in France as children, and we all sat on this tiny train. I remember this. Oh my god, it's so it's it's traumatising. And you'll sit you're you're sitting on this mini train going around the town. We're in Monaco, which is in a busy sort of cosmopolitan, classy place, and we're sitting on this mini train.

SPEAKER_02 7:25

I'm not sure we were being very classy.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

And it was slow, and everyone's sort of staring at you. I absolutely hated it. It traumatised me as a child. Which is interesting that now you're very happy to be on a stage. Well, and so I was sort of dreading being on display on this pony and cart, but it was totally the opposite experience. I think because of how other people responded to my presence. I thought it was going to be sort of slightly judging and pointing and all that sort of thing. And it was so friendly. So, so there you go. So that is a it's a really good thing to think about. I think part of what we fear in executive presence is that sort of being on display. Yeah, that we're and that we're being judged. And actually, what we experienced overall was delight that they were experiencing something different and refreshing. And boy, is there an analogy there for executive presence. Definitely different. So, today, as we talk about pony, I mean anyone who's listening to this podcast for the first time must be like, that is one hell of a link. And also, is this what people do in England? Like they go around and one pony and cats. Look, because I because we live in a particular, you know, we live in a in an area that is very touristy in the summer, it's very pretty. I was thinking there will be people from like across the pond saying, oh my god, like they actually! There's Brits, they actually at the weekend, they actually get around in a pony and car. It's unbelievable, like they really haven't caught up. To be fair, to be fair, we did. To be fair, that is what we were doing. It was brilliant.

What Executive Presence Really Means

SPEAKER_01 9:00

It was brilliant. Okay, so today we're talking about executive presence, and we're gonna do two episodes on this. I'm sure we will revisit it. It is also a kind of bringing together of a number of our tools. We really want to put it under the banner, though, of executive presence. We get asked about this a lot. I mean a lot. And even when people don't necessarily know that's what they need, it is what they need. And it's an interesting one, isn't it? Because we talk about impact a lot, and there's crossover, the Venn diagram of impact, communication, executive presence are definitely there. There's something slightly different about executive presence that when we talk about impact and communication, we might not quite be talking about the sense, the kind of just the felt sense. I mean, it's there, but executive presence, it's really there. It needs to be it's needs to be how you are communicating, how you're credibility and gravitas just by your way of being. So it's not that that's not there in communication and um leadership and impact, it's the it's the executive presence, it's it's it's the big chunk of it, really. Yeah. So it's the tangibles that it's the tangibles and the intangibles. Yeah, and I and I'm gonna say this there kind of is no silver bullet, and I'm gonna caveat that by saying at 4D, we are very, very good at kind of honing things down and giving you the the the clear, simple and few things you need to get this. So you are gonna get that, and there are a few components to it. It's not like if you just change one thing, you will necessarily get where you need to get to, unless that's just the one thing that that needs to shift for you. There are there are a few components to it. So when you're looking at other people and thinking, oh, they have so much sort of status and executive presence, just be aware for you individually, it might be two, three, four kind of tweaks that you need to think about and make. It's not necessarily just one thing, but it we'll go through the elements that were that for us generally in the work that we do, the elements for us that tend to show up and need to be uh adjusted. And it is very unique, it's you finding yours, not copying someone else's. Where I think with some communication tools, you can see all I can see they're using that tool, I'm gonna try that. It's slightly different, and I would say on executive presence, and that's what makes it both interesting and slightly more uh needing uh hopefully people like us who really know their stuff in this area to really get to grips with it because it is quite a bit more about the internal narrative and belief system. Whereas, you know, you can have a presentation skills tool around stagecraft or structuring that's very, very tangible. You can grab it, fill it in, do it. And this executive presence is tough if you don't believe in yourself, if you're not anchored and grounded in your own. Which is why we like it so much, Phil, because we love those. Those inner workings, we love it. So the first thing I'm gonna say on this is why people ask us about this. And it's what's really interesting, is that I would say, I don't know if you would agree with this, Phil, but I would say of all of the developmental areas that I get asked about from clients and potential clients, executive presence is often it's the one that is most mentioned through feedback from somebody else. So very often people will think about things that they want, they want to be a better presenter, have more confidence, get a promotion, whatever it might be. Very often when people come and ask about executive presence, it's because somebody has said to them, This you need you need to have more executive presence. Not always, but it's just interesting that those words are often used in in feedback. Yeah, well, I think it's an interesting one that I think that's true. And I if I sort of broaden, if I kind of dig into that a bit more, it makes me think it's got a parallel with networking for two reasons. One is we can find that we've suddenly crossed a career line and we just need it. We just we need a bigger network because we're no longer rolling our sleeves up to do the work we are influencing at a connection level. And with executive presence, we suddenly find we've been really good at communicating or doing presentations and slide decks. We need to be able to walk into a room now and all eyes just come to us. Yeah. And we've sudden we're suddenly in that role. We've been given that promotion, but we haven't done that bit. Yes. And I think that that also has got another link with networking, that it's never too early to do these things. There is no reason to not have executive presence when you're early in career. Like, why wouldn't you? No, don't wait till you're in the boardroom. Don't wait till you've got the role. Like get your network and your executive presence, get it going, make it part of your job. Yeah. If you're early in career and you walk into a room and people go, Oh, who's this? Great! Yeah, job done. In fact, I I would say, Phil, that we will talk about lots of different elements: networking, impact, influencing, relationships, status, comms, all of those things are there. For me, why executive presence is so important and why people come to us, and you know, confidence is in there as well. But the reason people come to us at a very broad level is for me, executive presence is about what people believe about you. That's it, it's their belief system about you, and there's lots of things that feed into that. But that is the piece that very often blocks us from getting to getting to the next level, being seen in a certain way. So it's 100%. It's really shifting people's beliefs. 100%, and that's why I love that because it's got it's got a touch of the sort of it's got a kind of mix of the story, the narrative, the kind of confidence, the visioning. It's and it's all wrapped up, it's you know, it can take you to a place where a leader can be like, oh, wow. And I believe that they can take us there. And and that has got a, you know, I mean, if we think about sort of historically, sort of, you know, epic, global, historic, religious leaders, it's got that, it's got that epic feel, hasn't it? Yeah. And I think executive presence can really have that. I don't quite know why I want to follow them, but boy, I really, really want to follow them. Exactly, exactly. And it's the difference between, as we so often talk about, all of the knowledge gathering, the knowing, the solving, the performing, the reaching APIs, all of that brilliant, brilliant, brilliant. It's the difference between that and being somebody that people believe in. Yeah. So if you think of somebody, it's making me think actually of you know, you've got two people, you know, I don't know, there's forest fires, very topical, and you know, you've got to get on a boat, you're on the coast and you've got to get on a boat. There's two boats and two captains, and you look at those captains, and one is saying, Well, wait, I've got the ship. If I hold it, I've driven this boat for 20 years. Yeah, it can hold 350 people. If we can all line up and I'll take and the other one's saying, I've got this. Everybody, step my way. I know where we're going, I'll take you there. Let's get, let's get to, you know, let's get to a safe place. Bring your children, bring your who's for I want the child, you know, bring your elderly first. We're all gonna do this together. I want to go on that boat. Right, so so think of somebody who you've worked with who wasn't necessarily the smartest or most knowledgeable person in the room. But the moment that they spoke, the room changed. Something changed. And people leaned in and their opinion carried further. The facts kind of went. In fact, the slides were off the screen. People put their folders down, they were just caught in that messaging. Yeah. Now think of somebody who's the opposite. Think of somebody who walks in, takes you through the data, takes you through the spreadsheet, takes you through that very overcomplicated slide that nobody can possibly understand, and certainly anybody with any neurodiversity can't even focus, like it's so busy. And think about the difference in the experience for you. And they both have their place, but now think about that gap and the gap in terms of the excitement and how it feels and how you remember them. Yes, exactly. And um, you've made a really good note when we were preparing for this, Phil, that a really good word to hold in mind is credibility. And I'm just gonna let get everyone to pause as I mention that word and just notice if your mind goes to well, I am credible because I I always deliver, because we're not talking about competence. Competence and credibility are two are two different things, and we're gonna trust that you've got the competence, you're doing your job, you're performing, you're doing all that stuff really, really well. And we cannot just rely on that, particularly the more senior we get. So we're really talking about credibility, not just credibility to do your job, but credibility in terms of the belief that people have in you, both now in your current role and in potential future. And I think this also speaks to why this is so important, why executive presence is so important, because I don't think you and I could count the number of conversations we've had with people who have who have come to us, maybe finally, maybe at a kind of critical point, because they've been passed over for the person that they don't think is as good as their job. It's so it happens all the time, and it's so frustrating for people because at some level we are you know we we we believe in a meritocracy, we've worked really hard, we've got the results, and yet the person who is perceived to have the presence and that way of being has got the promotion. So it can feel really unfair, but and you can learn it. Yes, and you can you can develop it. 100% feel and to give it a few. And it's important, it's it is important, it is important, and to give you a stat on that, uh some research for the Centre for Talent Innovation, led by Sylvia Ann Hewlett, surveyed hundreds of senior executives and used the word executive presence and found that executive presence accounts for roughly a quarter of what it takes to get you to your next promotion. Now, that is a big chunk of change, Phil, when it comes to getting a promotion. And I wonder, I wonder how if a quarter of your time preparing for that, for that interviewers' interview rounds are spent on that. Exactly. So in this episode, we're gonna look at what we mean by executive presence, a real kind of practical definition of it using our 4D model as ever, um, because it's not one thing. We're gonna look at the hierarchy trap. I've literally just come off a coaching call where this has come up super interesting, where you think, what you think is going on versus actually it's an internal thing. And the hierarchy gap is a really important one to break through for executive presence and what we call the locus of control. So kind of you know, pleasing the world, doing the work or giving the data to prove yourself to be right, to please, versus the internal locus of control. This is about what I believe. I've got this. Yeah, and the comms, the comms piece, a word we often use is is gravitas, which again uh not dissimilar to executive presence. It can be a difficult word to grapple with in terms of what we have to actually do to get it, but we'll we'll talk about that. Yeah, and we need to sort of just add into that as well with that gravitas. It's also there's a bit of work there which we do a lot of on the ego, because this isn't about a rigid, I know I'm right, and everyone needs to believe me. It's actually the real confidence of this is where I am, this is what I believe, talk to me. Yeah, I'm open and I'm so secure I can hear anything. Yeah, we're gonna look at why, thirdly. So, why this is so important for you, for your career, for teams, for who gets heard in the room. And then we're also gonna look at um how to spot it in others. So we're gonna help you raise your awareness on your own executive presence in this episode. So we'll define it, we'll we'll help you become more aware of the elements of your own executive presence, where you feel you have less of it, and where you uh where you might be able to spot it already. And then in the next episode, we'll get into those tangible tools of how you can dial it up out there in the world and overcome those blockers or kind of belief mindsets, authority that is getting in the way. So that's what we're gonna do. Maybe a quick reminder of the 4D2C model, just so that you've got the pegs on which we're gonna hang everything. You know, we said that there's no magic bullet, you know, nothing in life is is desperately simple. But that said, the 4D2C model makes everything much more simple. So the four dimensions, two contexts of you, of your executive presence. So you wanna think about your executive presence in the physical. Dimension, how you're appearing and operating in terms of your body and your appearance. Space. Yeah. You want to think about your emotional dimension. Are you regulated? They very often say the

The 4D2C Model Explained

SPEAKER_01 22:11

calmest person in the room is the most senior person in the room. And how you're making other people feel, which is hugely important for presence. Intellectually, how are you operating? How are you thinking? What are you filtering? What are you saying? How are you structuring your language? How are you creating emphasis, impact, and gravitas with the words you're choosing and the voice, uh, the vocal approach? Intentional, what sits behind, as Philippa said, uh, sort of going back to the ego. Are we taking in unconscious intentions around wanting to please, wanting to be good, uh, wanting to be seen as uh doing the right thing? All of these things can really impact our executive presence, our status, and our gravitas. Relationships, we will talk about the network around you and how you're operating in relationship and the environment. The environment is a huge one. I did a coaching call this morning and I absolutely started there. And I always go back to the parent-teacher meetings where my kids were sworn. I've mentioned this before, you know, the teachers will put you on a tiny child's chair. So your environment has already set the status for who's holding uh more seniority and more uh status in this conversation, which is very often the teacher. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:22

Take a cushion, take control, teach them.

SPEAKER_01 23:25

Yeah, take control of your environment. Uh, you know, board meetings when you're when you step in a room, you know, where do you end up sitting? All of these things are having a huge impact in terms of teaching meeting. I am I've actually got a bad back at the moment, so I'd like to do this standing up, thank you. And then you're you know, you're a foot taller than that. Um it's not to put teachers down at all. Um they don't do it deliberately, it's just the chairs.

SPEAKER_02 23:47

Those are the chairs that they've got, but it's that limp. A little bit like the bathrooms, those are the toilets they've got. I mean, that's a whole other story, karate. That's a that's a that's a that's a that's a sudden dive down, isn't it? Tiny, tiny tiny. Tiny tiny.

unknown 24:02

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 24:03

So before we crack on with that, let's let's talk about the trap of the hierarchy trap and the locus of control. So I'm actually going to start with the locus of control, because that's a term that probably a lot of people don't necessarily know. And the locus of control is if you imagine almost your your control centre, what's driving you. And we can think about the locus of control as outside of ourselves or inside of ourselves. Now, this is a this is a huge piece developmentally, anyway.

Locus Of Control And Ownership

SPEAKER_01 24:37

In executive presence, let's be really clear. This is the shift you absolutely have to have already made or made. This is not a negotiable. When you have your locus of control outside of yourself, it means that your focus is on making it okay for other or um pleasing other or getting the sort of externally driven, let's say. So it might be that from school, I'm you know, giving my homework for the teacher. I'm not yet connected to, oh my goodness, I I love the Tudors. I just want to, you know, eight, you're like, I just want to know more about Henry and his six wives. Actually, you're thinking I've got to do this because mummy and daddy will be bleed, or daddy and daddy, or mummy and my parents will be pleased, or the teacher will be pleased. So we we do learn to be to have a locus of control outside of ourselves, because I suspect most five-year-olds wouldn't choose to go to school otherwise. Yeah, and and I would say I would say a really good indicator is uh a couple of things say you know that those those rare children who who, for whatever reason, through what how that their genetics or how they've been conditioned, who are who have a very at very young age, they have an internal locus of control. You really notice them really know them because they they own things because they want to do things, they're self-motivated internally, but they also don't do things to please the world. To please other people, which is tricky as a child. Well, our sister, you went to Chessington World of Adventures. Um I have to say, I'm thanks for taking one for the team, Pen. Um for uh for one of your daughter's birthdays, and uh, our other sister went uh with um I think some of her grand yeah her grandchildren. Two grandchildren, yeah. And they met on one of the rides. A little girl showed up. I was like, I was like, where was the parent? Oh, she was sort of there, but the child was like seven or eight, absolutely took control, locus of control internally, told her who she was, told her, you know, everything she said, I know so much about this child, she was so confident, so just like this independent, almost like some people might call like an old soul. But it is rare, it's much more usual to be externally driven. Where's you know, where's my caregiver? Which we're taught. Let me ask, let me ask, you know, my my parent. So obviously at work, this can show up, and for all of our histories as well, we might have been conditioned to please others or to um perform for others or to get things right. All really normal. When our locus of control is external, I'll have to check with them, I'll you know, I'm doing this for what did you think? And and we only feel validated once they have approved it, then we are much more externally driven. When the locus of control is internal, that doesn't mean we don't care about anybody else. It means we are connected, and for us, of course, this would be intention, the center of the 4D2C model. We are connected to our reason for doing it. It doesn't make us closed and rigid, it means that we are internally referencing, we are trusting ourselves, we're checking in with our own internal feeling and thinking, and that's our reference point, that's our barometer, if you like, rather than what do they think. And this is hugely important for executive presence because that is what people the the sense that you get that they don't always think they're right, they don't have all the answers, but they are absolutely centered in ground on in solid, in who they are, and even if they change their mind or shift or move, they're shifting from a place of internal stability, they've got a core, a central self. Not because, not because they've got to I fear what somebody else has said or I want their praise or whatever it might be. One of the words I often use around this, because there's lots of different ways you can you can look at the locus of control and think about it. As Philip said, it's a huge topic. One of the ways I think about this is very often when I'm talking to clients, not necessarily about executive presence, but maybe around personal profile, your kind of branding reputation, your personal narrative. I talk about ownership, like ownership of who you are, and you will not be perfect, there will not be not everything about you will be uh amazing. There'll be lots of great stuff that's amazing, but it's just taking ownership of this. This is who I am, this is what I believe, this is what I I want to do, rather than I think this is who I should be, or this is what they might want. And as you mentioned, Phil, it's it is a transition from a child because when we are very young as a toddler, we don't really understand that we are a separate person and that we can own who we are. We don't really know who we are. So it's very natural that the locus of control is external and we develop and we learn. It's just that because those lessons were so strong as children, very often we are left with a very strong external locus of control. And we can have both and we can shift between the two, but a hierarchical structure in a corporate environment will very often lead us back to that external locus of control. And it takes me to have you got stuck? Because it's like you say, it's really normal. You enter a new environment, or maybe even a new job. You've been in corporate for a while, or you've been in business for a while, but you enter a new culture. Really normal to go, right? How does it work here? Let me look outside and see what the environment is. And it reminds me of a conversation we had with one of our nieces yesterday, and her little one is in nursery. And one of the people who ran the nursery just very gently hinted at, I wonder if it's time for us to go down from two naps to what just to see. And what was interesting about it was that's a good example of as a parent, you're still moving between an internal locus of control as you get more confident and know your own child, but an external locus of control where you've got uh experts who might be a midwife earlier on, or somebody who runs a nursery. So it's really good, it's really useful. They're both useful, it's just really knowing the difference. And if we if we now map this with the second model, and then we'll give you some tips on how to think about this before we before we move on. So, one thing I'd say on the locus of control is just think about anything in your life. It could be baking a cake or cleaning your house or driving your car. Think about an activity that you do or have that is definitely internally driven. You know what you're doing, you know how you like to do it, and that's you know, that's your way of doing it, and you're very confident on that. Just notice what is or isn't there, just notice how that feels. Notice how weird it would be if somebody said, Well, that's not how I make an apple cake. Just and you go, Well, that's that's fine. This is how I like to do it. So just notice what that feels like in your body and what the thought process is and what doesn't feel shaky or vulnerable there or isn't focused outside of yourself. And that's the feeling that you can start to expand into areas that probably you've got more competence than perhaps you've caught up with yet. Yeah. You can start to think about that in that way. It's not that I'm not open to new recipes, not open, it's not that I'm not open to new ideas at work, and I'm really confident and certain that this is how I see this or I like to do this. And one of the greatest gifts of this, which will kind of segue on to onto your next model, Phil, is the ability to let go of at a certain level both criticism and praise. Because the external locus of control is constantly seeking new information externally to better understand themselves, their decision making, their performance, what people think of them. So whether that's criticism, feedback, or whether that's praise, we want that information because it's important to us when we're operating from an external locus of control to inform us who we are and how we're operating in the world. Is it good? Is it is it not good? It's not that feedback, criticism, praise is not useful and nice, and it's it is. It's just that with the internal locus of control, we don't rely on it. So it's fine. If you praise me, thank you. If you give me critical feedback, thank you. I'm kind of the same about all of it. I'm I'm interested in it, but it's not going to sort of knock me off my centre or making me. Exactly. And I think this is really important the more senior we get. And and I often say this to very senior executives because at some point there will not be anybody more senior left to give you.

SPEAKER_02 33:26

I literally said this to a client yesterday.

SPEAKER_01 33:28

I said, you know, that you just you're just running out of people. You're running out of people. So we need to let go of it. We need to let go of it so that we can operate, as you said, from that really sort of solid place. Because it's very yeah, it's very Buddhist, actually. It's very Eastern, that um, that sense of actually, if you don't want to be caught on criticism, you have to also be released from needing, from relying on the praise, exactly. And it does make me think there's always so much more to say, isn't there? So I'm gonna say one more thing and then we'll go on to the second model and then then then move on with um some executive presence um awareness raising. If you're if you know that you need that praise or validation externally, we are very aware as we talk about this, it's all very well saying, oh, and you just need to be sure in yourself. It is about taking care of the part of yourself that still wants that. And I know this is slightly going into sort of therapy territory, but it would be remiss to pretend it wasn't there. That there is a part of you that yearns for that, and so there is an element, and this is not kind of woo-woo, soft, soft, soft touch. You need to comfort that part and say, I hear you, I can hear that you really want to get that validation. We're gonna be okay. Yeah, we're gonna be, and even if they don't agree, I've got you. We'll be because if you don't practice that that internal voice, you're gonna you're gonna stay stuck. So it's seeking it, seeking it. Yeah, seeking it. So it sounds a bit weird, but you've got to imagine that part of you as that young sort of school child going, Oh, I hope I get the I hope I get the certificate. And you've got to say to them, I've got this, it's all right. I know you're frightened. Because otherwise, they'll keep getting at the wheel and demand the certificate. Yeah. So the second model, and I'm going to go very quickly on this because I think we have talked about it before, is the model. I don't think we're gonna go quickly on this. No, I know it's a bit. I love this model so. I know, okay, fair enough. We won't go quickly. Parent, adult, child. It's from transactional analysis, and it's a really, really useful model for thinking about our patterns in hierarchy. And I've again, I literally looked at this this morning with a client. If we think about so PAC, parent, adult, child. The three, the three roles the three ego states which brought them in transactional analysis. That that you that you learn to operate. And we all take them. It's all normal, you know. This again, this isn't to criticize, but it's really normal. You know, I might

Parent Adult Child In Hierarchy

SPEAKER_01 35:56

say to you, Oh Penn, oh, have you got any have you got any chocolate? Oh, make us a cup of tea. And that's a sort of, you know, it can be quite a child asking, you know, asking you to play parent role, and vice versa. And and we can and we can play with it. Yeah. It's when it becomes something that gets stuck or a pattern and is getting in the way. Yeah. So it's a good idea. Go on, you go. Well, no, I was just going to give an example of how we can almost walk into a room, or we can frame somebody in our mind, and it might actually be a boss. Yeah. We can frame them in our mind as somebody that we need to check with them, or as long as they as long as they're okay with it, or they might be upset if I. Those those kind of ways of thinking are just telling you, you might be shifting into parent child. And if you imagine a peer in the same situation, you'd probably have very different language, like, I must, I must run that by her. We we need to agree together that we're that we're okay with this. It's not that you take the issue away, it's that you take the power dynamic away. Rather than thinking, oh, I wonder if I said the right thing there, or I wonder if that's what they wanted. And if I take a step back to what you said about, you know, this being so normal, when you think about when you're a baby and a child, you're simply learning from people around you what it means to be a human being. And in relationship. In relationship. And you are initially exposed to two I call them roles, Philippa calls them ego state. So you're exposed to yourself and possibly siblings. So children who want cuddles and cookies. Yeah, who and who who are either, you know, they they behave in a certain way because they're children. Very normal, they are children. It would be weird if they start walking around like they're a senior executive at three years old. Yeah. Yeah. Or maybe maybe an iPad these days. So you're so so one of your first exposures is is to yourself or siblings, so you understand, ah, that's what it's like to be a human. Childlike state. The other role that you're introduced to very early is the parent, might be a caregiver, might be your parent. Um, so you understand, ah, that's that's that's a parent role. So these are the two, these are the two kind of states, roles, ego states that you get introduced to initially. So you start understanding how to be a human being either as the parent role or as the child role. So just bear in mind that those are the two roles we learn first. And the third role, which is the adult role, we all learn at different stages. Do you know what I love about this? And I remember really waking up to this, and it's interesting I use the word waking up. I remember realizing, and I have said this to so many people throughout my career, there is not a day that you wake up usually, and I mean, unless you've got a traumatic event, maybe, but it you for most people, there is not a day that you wake up where you go, ah, I'm an adult now. It doesn't happen. No. And I think you think it will. I think you think it will, but of course it doesn't. And depending on our parents, our caregivers, our teachers, our initial bosses, and all of those things, what we've been role-modelled in terms of adult behaviour, I'm putting that in inverted commas, we will learn different things at different stages and different levels of adult. So when we go into the workplace, it isn't and our life in general. I mean, think about your most intimate relationships. It is completely normal that we kind of roll, we we um cycle through operating in a slightly childlike way, operating in a slightly parent type way, um, and operating in an adult way. It's completely normal. And when we're talking about executive presence, particularly those more child roles when you're in a hierarchy, are often one of the things that are most blocking you from having executive presence. Yeah. It's really important to say here that of course you are going into hierarchical systems a lot of the time. There's very few systems that are working on a kind of you know holocracy or a kind of systems. Most, most organizations are still have got that original kind of what we call blue, more orange matrix structure, but it's still a hierarchy. There are there are, you know, you get promoted to VP, S VP. And this is the difference. And it feels nice. And you go, well, it's neither, and you go, but but what's important with the executive presence with this kind of confidence is it is not the same as the label. The hierarchy on your business card, albeit a digital one or your you know, LinkedIn profile, we are not talking about that. I don't care if that says president of the world, and we can think of a few people who'd like that role, but I, you know, I don't care if that's what it says. That is, that does not have to impact having a level playing field in terms of the relationship. And well, and also it's not an automatic guarantee. I mean, uh as you said earlier, Phil, I think, you know, we think, or when I'm an I know, I remember when we were kids, you know, we used to joke with our sister about all the things we would do as adults. You know, Charlotte was always saying she'd have a cover full of sweets when she's an adult. Because you, you know, you think you can do what you want when you sort of can. When you're an adult, you're like, why would I do that? But as you said, you don't suddenly wake up one day one day and go, oh, I'm an adult. And it's it's also when you get the promotion or when you step into that boardroom. It doesn't necessarily it doesn't mean just because I've got that title or I've got that opportunity to be with those people that suddenly, well, I've I'm SVP, so therefore I've got all these deputy presidents in the board. It doesn't necessarily come hand in hand. We have to do some development work. And how many times have you asked coaching clients, have you reached out to that president, that SVP, and they and they say, I would never dare. And you go, Yeah, and that's why it's so lonely up there, because actually they might quite like it. Yeah, exactly. And they're a human being as well. Yeah, that's exactly they're a human being that's leveling the playing field. So yeah, so on the two. Yeah, so the parent adult child model, we'll we'll refer back to these as we go through, and we will we will come to here and in the next episode, very tangible sort of comms and behavioural tools. But just notice, first of all, just notice parent adult child is so brilliant. Notice if you're telling your team, come on now, I need you to do this, and I'm exaggerating it, but if you've if you note or overnurturing, don't worry, you know, I'll take care of you. Notice where you go into parent, and then notice where you go into child. Is it all right if I? Would you mind if I? It's not fair. And and and a and a really quick way, and we've said this before in other contexts, there's lots of tools which we're gonna give you to get into that adult executive presence state. The pronoun we does so much because if I do this, will you be okay if I do this? It's very different from let's both of us uh you know get to an agreement on this. We we need to get back to Bob on this, and that is immediately leving the playing field. So you can do really quick things to raise your executive presence and your status. So those are two kind of big internal pieces which I'm sure on future podcasts we will explore even more because Philip and I absolutely love them. I by the way, Phil, attachment theory is making the headlines at the moment. It's like the new, it's the new model du jour. So we might have to talk about that on another on another podcast. I mean that's from the 19 sort of 40s, 60s. It's great though, I mean it's wonderful. Those two models are just really good ways to think about your belief-yourself-belief um system and how you view the world. So the parent adult child and the locus of control. Yeah, let's do attachment because it really ties in with this. Yeah. Okay, I'm gonna do a few stats, Pen, and then I'm gonna then I'm gonna um hand over to you to start um putting some pieces together. So, as Penelope said, a quarter of your kind of how people perceive you, how you might get through to the next rung of your career is is 26% is based on your executive presence. And inside that 26%, so if that's a quarter of kind of your uh how you're seen and you know the reasons for your success, within executive presence, if we break executive presence down into a kind of 100%, then 67% is about gravitas, 28% is about your communication style, so so kind of what you say and how you say it, and five percent is your appearance. And I just think this is so interesting. And I'm gonna put just put a couple of

The Numbers Behind Gravitas

SPEAKER_01 44:19

things into these stats because they are interesting. Firstly, for us, all of that gravitas, communication, and clothing, all of that is you is how you communicate who you are, all of that is impact. Gravitas isn't some Weird kind of magic thing that you go, well, it'll turn up or it won't. It's about what you do and how you show up. So it's still about communication. That 28% is more that explicit communication, which um we do lots on and we will touch on. The 5% is really interesting. And I've just worked with a client, we literally finished today, and it was a really wonderful ending. And boy, is was that executive presence on display, that space, that taking up the space, that ownership. And our quick win to start with was that 5%. So that 5% of clothing can be the tip of your arrow. You can do that immediately. And you need to do that immediately because it's such an instant way people see you. So it's definitely, I would agree, not the big percentage, but it is your quick win. Once you've got executive presence, looking at our latest prime minister, you can wear a t-shirt. Because you're such a great communicator. That's so true for us. That we don't care about it anymore. But and it's a really, really good way-in. It's a good door opener. I've got the sharpsuit, you know, whatever it is, whatever it is for you that works, or the kind of you know, cutting-edge fashion, whatever your version is, that means that people just instantly look at you in a different way. Now you've got to follow up with some of these tools, but just to say, initially, easy win, long term, not a huge percentage. Yeah. Totally, totally. Your environment and your clothes will do an awful lot for you as you're doing the work to build that sort of inner gravity. You could be in a t-shirt on a rubbish dump. Yeah. If you become executive president. If that core, if that core inside is solid. Absolutely, absolutely. But but while you're doing the work, if you know you've got work to do on this, at the very least, don't let your clothing and your environment let you down as you as you're trying to build up your executive presence. Just get them to do some quick wins, as you said. So we're really going to talk about awareness on this episode. And then the next episode on executive presence, we're really going to dive into some very tangible comms tools around how to how to build much more executive presence and impact. So, in terms of awareness, first of all, are you aware of your executive presence? So, either have you got some feedback from anybody or have you noticed anything about yourself? So, first of all, just have a think. Is executive presence building something that's going to be useful and interesting to me? And I would offer 99% of clients I meet at whatever level, there is going to be some element of executive presence building. It's it's rare, it's rare you find somebody that's that's that's kind of got it all, very occasionally.

Practical Awareness Exercises

SPEAKER_01 47:20

So probably the answer to that question is yes, but have a think about it. You might want to ask people uh about that. Second thing I would say, we say this a lot in coaching generally, it's very important in executive presence, the awareness raising. So as you're in meetings, having conversations, observing other people, whatever it might be, presenting, start parallel processing and observing how you're operating in those four dimensions. So, how am I behaving physically? How am I feeling and for making others feel emotionally? What's my language like and my structure intellectually pace, pace, all of those things which we'll come on to in the in the next episode? And intentionally, what have I taken into this meeting? Have I taken in wanting to impress, fear, whatever it might be? Yeah, or have I taken in something else? Yeah, an intention to connect, to inspire, whatever it might be. So it's that observation piece is the very first piece because until we do that, we can give you all the tools in the world. If you're not in a space where you're able to self-observe and observe your impact on other people, it's quite difficult to make those changes and believe that you need to make those changes. So just get realistic. It's the Boston Group, it's the the where the paradox of change, isn't it? We cannot change until we recognise where we are. I mean, it's just it's impossible. Yeah. I want to give you another tool on this, and it's the executive presence lineup. So you can either in your mind or on a piece of paper, write down 10 people, including yourself, different different. Even when you're in a room in a meeting. Yeah, oh, definitely. When you're if you're if you're in a meeting or on a virtual call and you've got, you know, anything between five and ten, twenty, doesn't matter, however many people. Pick about ten, include yourself in it. Um, and I say this, hopefully you'll be super engaged in your meeting, but if you're not, you can do it during your meeting as a little experiment. And write down one to ten on a line. And now I want you to put the people that you've chosen, including yourself, use code. Yeah, exactly. Don't show them use code or initials or whatever. From one to ten. One is no executive presence, really. I'd not even really aware. In fact, were they even in the meeting? Ten is boy, all eyes. Everybody's waiting for them. Even when they're not speaking, people are checking or looking, they're holding the room. When they walk in, they we all know that uh it would be uh it would that they're not even chairing the meeting, and yet we all sort of assume they are. They don't necessarily even have the hierarchy, but but that but that's who they are. They're number 10. Place yourself on the line and place everybody else where you think they go. Now notice where you are, first of all. So let's say you've put yourself at five, just to make this really easy. What is it that everyone above you is doing that means that they're higher than you? What is it that they're doing in terms of how they walk into a room, the eye contact that they make, the way that they speak, the pace that they speak, the way that they greet people, the way that they leave a room, um, the way they ask a question? Any I mean it's endless. What are they doing? You've got to become executive present anthropologists. And then you look down the line and go, what is it that they're doing or not doing? And then ask yourself, what would it need from you to move up that scale? So that's a really fundamental. But again, before we've even given you any tools, you can you can learn so much yourself because bear in mind Penelope and I are not in your cultures, so yours there'll be things within your culture that are really specific. So, you know, it might be a culture that is really super playful or funny, and actually the people who are more like that maybe get more attention. Who knows? And this isn't to say conform, it's just to notice who are the people in your system that that that definitely rank higher with executive presence. One of the big ones for me is how much space you take up, literally how much physical space you take up. Yeah, which we'll talk we'll talk about very specifically next time. How you can do that. So, do your lineup and be really honest with yourself. And also just notice, and maybe if you've got a really trusted person that you could check with, it would be really interesting to know if they would rank you higher or lower than you've ranked yourself. Yeah. So that's the you know, the gap is the most interesting thing on self-awareness. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna give you two other uh awareness raises now. So the first one is film yourself. Now I know that this can feel edgy and difficult, and it is one of the only ways that you're gonna see some of the things that are unconsciously diminishing your executive presence. So you don't have to show it to anybody, you don't even have to have anybody else in the room when you're filming yourself. Get yourself on camera, do a one-minute introduction of your team or a project, whatever it might be, watch it. And the things that you're looking out for are things like posture, smile, pace of voice, little kind of habits we've got. Body movement. How do you use your arms? How you use your arms, body movement, is the head moving quite a lot? You know, we're smiling quite a lot. So just notice and write down some things about yourself that you're noticing, particularly in the physical dimension and also around the voice, and just notice how that maps in terms of what physical behaviours are upping your executive presence and what is bringing them down. So film yourself, we'll give you some very specific tools that you can shift in terms of your impact at next episode, but just get aware, first of all. I noticed when when I first started doing this work many, many years ago, Phil, I filmed, in fact, I I think Tom filmed me when uh when he was here, and I had a little sort of tick in my voice that I was never I had never been aware of before, and I wouldn't have noticed it because I can't hear it. So it's really, really useful to film yourself. The second thing I'm gonna mention, which we may also talk about next time, is my absolute favourite thing, diminutive words. So I'm gonna say I'm gonna say a list of words now, and we're not gonna get you to change your language on this episode, we're not gonna get you to think about the words you do want to say, I'm gonna get you to think about the words you don't want to say, and I'm gonna give you a list now that will drive you completely crazy because now that I've said them, you will now notice them when you say them and it'll drive you mad. So words such as just maybe basically sorry, I think a big one for me. Uh does that make sense? But I would often put in there as well Only, these are all words that are reducing the status, the impact of what we're saying. And we very often say them because of habits, and we often say them because humility is quite nice in terms of making people feel comfortable, and it's a tool that lots of us have learnt to use. It's not always helpful when it comes to executive presence, or certainly some of the aspects of humility are not useful when it comes to it comes to executive presence. We really don't want to be diminishing ourselves, we don't want to be arrogant, but we don't want to pull ourselves down beneath other people. So watch those diminutive words. You know what this makes me think of before I go on to some of the other tips, and I want to add one to the filming, it makes me think of something that again I've used a lot, I think you've used a lot. You have to kind of catch up with yourself. Because the thing about diminutive words is that's part of a narrative that you that you have. If we think about when we maybe when we first enter the workplace or we're younger, that oh, I I think it might be, or I just I just wanted to check because that feels quite reasonable when we're entering a sort of new territory, and then we can sort of get stuck. And part of the reason is maybe we don't want to be arrogant or whatever it might be, two things on that. One is we are the only person who is carrying our 15-year-old self inside us. We are the only person, no one else. Thank God, thank God, thank God, nobody else has that as a reference point, which takes me to the second thing. So when you go, oh, oh I don't know, maybe that maybe that big grown-up person thinks I'm an idiot. No, because they're seeing you not as a 15-year-old, as a grown-up. Which brings me on to the second thing, which is part of executive presence, is not being arrogant, it's owning the truth. That's right, it's catching up with yourself, it's not knowing everything, but it's saying, crikey, I know. I've got some decades of experience. I need to own it. I'm not a 15-year-old, I'm a woman or a man or whatever of X years. That's what people are seeing, and it would be it's weird and actually not truthful to own that. Yeah, that's true. I mean, I just love that. It's truth, not arrogance. I love that. Okay, I want to add a thing to your filming, which is got as it's related as an as another tip on that. Imagine your last meeting, and imagine you were on mute, and people could only see you physically. What how would they rate you in terms of your presence? And another way to play with this is if you're in a public place or a restaurant or a cafe on the pavement or a bus or a train, and there are people a little distance away that you can see but you can't hear, start asking yourself how what you think about them. Yeah, what do you think about them? How much gravitas they have, how much status they have, how much authority they have, just based on how they're holding themselves. And it will be so instantly clear to you. If you imagine on a train, one of those tables with four swore seats around it, you you will immediately be able to rank who's got more status than the other people based on how you see them physically. So that's a really interesting exercise. And you might it might be wrong, but it's what it looks like. Yeah. Okay, energy check. So check your energy. We talk a lot about energy at 4D, just notice who is who is taking the space energetically and who is sort of diminished energetically, who is spreading energy around the room, who's contagious and who isn't, what your energy is doing, whether people are picking up on it, whether you're picking up on other people's energy. Just notice which way it's going and what you're having an impact. And we'll talk about this next time in terms of taking control of that. It's just useful to notice how energy, and it there's not good or bad around high and low energy. It's just useful to notice how much an individual's energy is establishing how much status they have in a room. Exactly. And that can go either way. It can go either way, but just it's not about high energy, low energy, it's about the impact that that has and owning it. Yeah. Rather than being at the mercy of other people's. Yeah. Another thing to think about, yeah, again, going back to awareness, is I would offer to write down three words that you think describe who you are as a leader, as an executive. So just write down three words. They can be anything at all. You could be inspiring, reliable. You have to imagine. You have to imagine if you were to ask somebody what three words would you use about me? What do you think they'd say? Yeah, that's right. So I I would offer to write them down about yourself, and then if you want to, ask a trusted colleague to give you three words. First of all, notice how different or or similar those three words are, and then look at those three or six words and have a think about are they words that you would associate with somebody senior, gravitas with a lot of executive presence? We'll talk next time about how we can shift and move. First thing is to notice the way people see me. Would I associate that with having a lot of people? Yeah, if you're exactly if the three words they give you are funny, yeah, quirky, um, crazy, diligent, and um um reflective. You're like, those are not three executive presentations. Not necessarily. Yeah, not necessarily. Okay, uh, next tip. We've got just two more. The next tip is the curiosity ratio. This is a huge one. It's a huge one. It does mean I've said before, Phil, I know somebody who made an entire very, very senior career with this one tip alone. Out of curiosity. What's so interesting is I don't think it's an immediate immediately obvious that this would be an executive presence quality. But if you think about how most people go into a meeting, which is to know, to prove, to say, to impart, to inform. Notice the people who go into a meeting simply to be curious, to ask questions, to find out whether that's how you are, what you know, what you've got, what you think, because they don't need to inform or impress. Yeah, they've got the space to be curious. So check your curiosity ratio on a scale of, you know, one to a hundred, 50% in the middle. Where are you on information at one end, information giving on one end, and curiosity on the other? And what could you do to dial up more towards the other? And this is one of the main reasons why lots of us find it very challenging to impart that seniority and status in interview situations because the balance in terms of the information I feel I must give versus the questions being asked is in such a way that the people with the questions are generally holding the status. But we can change that. Most of us have had decades of being rewarded for knowing, and it's more the exception who's been rewarded for asking questions. In fact, you've probably been told in your childhood school stop asking questions. Yeah, it's crazy, isn't it? Okay, and the final one is the adult check. So think about key relationships, key work relationships, particularly those hierarchical ones, and think about you can almost feel it in your body. Does it make me feel smaller? Do I feel like I'm in control of this relationship or do I feel on a level? Do I feel like we're adult to adult, equal? And you can literally do a map of all your relationships and just check because you don't really need to do as much work on the ones who already see you, adult to adult. That's you know, there's tools you can do, but actually we really want to get working on the ones where you're diminished. Well, it will also give you some information if you if you, you know, privately sort of map initials of people into the

Adult Check And Final Takeaways

SPEAKER_01 1:01:47

either parent box, adult box, or child box in terms of how you show up when you're with them. It can also give you some information, firstly, about how they tend to show up, because if if somebody tends to show up in quite a parenting style, and that can be either quite critical or quite caring and nurturing, um, it very often unconsciously just pushes us into the child. So often often it can be about the patterns other people have that will set the relationship. So make a note of how you tend to show up with other people. That might give you some information about them. Um, secondly, it might also give you some information about some things that tend to tip you into a space that's not useful. And it one of the most obvious ones is a is a corporate hierarchy, but it might be something else, it might be tall people, it you know, it might be something. Or not knowing. And actually, you know, I think one of the most wonderful places to get to is being certain in your uncertainty, you know, and that's executive presence as well. Is you know, I I don't know, and that's fine. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so notice that. Very good. So that's an episode on really understanding executive presence from this perspective. There's so much more we could say, but for us, this is the sort of hard. Kind of a belief, a belief and an awareness is what we've sort of covered today. What sits underneath the blockers to executive presence and how and how we can start raising our awareness so that next time we meet, we can give you some tools to start bridging and shifting. And we will bridge next time because there is a little bit more to do on the internal, which of course is your internal narrative, your your own belief system. So we've really looked more at that awareness. So we've looked at executive presence, we've looked at the four dimensions, because that's really where where we can start to map and change some of the behaviours and some

Resources And How To Connect

SPEAKER_01 1:03:26

of the beliefs. Obviously, we looked at some of that data, which is super interesting. We looked at the hierarchy trap, the parent-adult child model, and the locus of control, and we started to give you some tips on raising your lots of tips on raising your awareness of your own and others' executive presence. Get curious, be us be an anthropologist on this, because we can learn so much from what we see. Needless to say, we have got so much on our 4D on demand platform. I mean, the impact series alone will give you loads of tools that will really develop your executive presence. But we then we, of course, we've got the personal profile series, which is just huge for this. It really is your brand. And that is packed, that's got 15 modules in it. That is packed with tools around this. And then, of course, storytelling, visioning, and um presentation skills. So there's absolutely loads on 40 on demand. You can um you can literally go on our website, 40 Human Being, and you can buy those courses any anytime. Next time, we're gonna look more at those tools. We're gonna give you even more tools that when you walk into a room, you've got something to try that make people sit up and go, Wow, something shifted over there. We need to look at Bob a bit more. Lucky Bob. Bob's in the good books this week. Bob's having a good week. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Love executive presence. Looking forward to those tools next time, Phil. Yeah, me too. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of the 40 Human Being Podcast. We hope you enjoyed the show. Do take on board some of the insights, tools, and tips because every time that you try something new to get back to choice, you are making a vote for the you that you want to become. And I I love that phrase, Pen. I do too. And please do share this episode with somebody that you know would really benefit from the lessons and learnings we've been chatting about today. And of course, if you're interested in more from 4D Human Being, do get in touch. We run workshops, trainings online, in-person, conference events and keynotes. We've got the 4D on-demand platform for your whole organization, and we do have a free essentials membership where anybody can sign up for absolutely free to access some of our insights, tools, and tips. So do get in touch with us if you'd like to hear more. We cannot wait to hear from you and to carry on the conversation.